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From Santa Westerveld to Noel Matip – A Liverpool FC Christmas XI

With festive spirits high at Liverpool after seeing off Leicester, we’ve had a bit of fun and created a Reds XI made up of Christmas puns.

Have we missed any? Let us know yours in the comments section below!


Santa Westerveld

Nov. 2000: Liverpool goalkeeper Sander Westerveld prepares to kick the ball (Neal Simpson/EMPICS Sport)

Almost too easy that one, let’s be honest.


Markus Bauble

Markus Babbel, 2001 (Mike Egerton/EMPICS Sport)

We promise not to include Ryan Babbel with the same gag!


Noel Matip

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND - Thursday, December 16, 2021: Liverpool's Joel Matip during the FA Premier League match between Liverpool FC and Newcastle United FC at Anfield. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

Can’t help but think Matip wouldn’t quite seem as imposing if he was called Noel.


Stuffing Henchoz

Liverpool's Sami Hyypia (l) and Stephane Henchoz (r)

This one is likely to split opinion. Either inspired or dreadful.


John Arne Wreath-e

MONACO, FRANCE - Friday, August 24, 2001: Liverpool's John Arne Riise celebrates scoring his first goal for the club against Bayern Munich during the UEFA Super Cup Final at the Stade Louis II. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

Spent hours thinking of one for a left-back – is this acceptable?


St. Nick Barmby

ATHENS, GREECE - Thursday, November 23, 2000: Liverpool's Nick Barmby celebrates scoring the opening goal against Olympiakos during the UEFA Cup 3rd Round 1st Leg match at the Olympic Stadium. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

He’s been Saint Nicholas ever since burying that header against Everton back in 2000.


Danny Myrrh-phy

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND - Saturday, April 19, 2003: Liverpool's Danny Murphy celebrates scoring the winning gaol against Everton during the Merseyside Derby Premiership match at Goodison Park. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

I’ll get my coat!


Bruno Chey-rudolph

BANGKOK, THAILAND - Thailand. Thursday, July 24, 2003: Liverpool's (l-r) Djimi Traore, Bruno Cheyrou and Anthony Le Tallec line up to face Thailand before a preseason friendly match at the Rajamangala National Stadium. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

This one is a masterstoke, just like Cheyrou’s goal at Stamford Bridge.


Stan Hollymore

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND - Saturday, January 6, 1996: Liverpool's Stan Collymore celebrates scoring the second of his hat-trick of goals against Rochdale during the FA Cup 3rd Round match at Anfield. (Photo by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

The first of a tall, imposing front three.


Emile Hes-turkey

Emile Heskey, 2001 ( Mike Egerton/EMPICS Sport)

I can’t claim to have been the genius behind this one – I won’t say who was, for fear of inflating their ego!


Andy Carol

WEST BROMWICH, ENGLAND - Saturday, August 18, 2012: Liverpool's Andy Carroll in action against West Bromwich Albion during the opening Premiership match of the season at the Hawthorns. (Pic by David Rawcliffe/Propaganda)

Ironic this one, seeing as the image of the hulking striker singing a Christmas carol seems frankly ridiculous. He’s all about a festive all-dayer in town.


* A version of this article was first published on December 24, 2016.

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