Attention mainstream football writers

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Here’s a quick rundown of “offensive gesture” incidents to help your write your Luis Suarez stories properly:

9 May 2011: Manchester United and England player Wayne Rooney is photographed and videotaped making a clear V-sign toward Chelsea fans. FA decides not to take action.

17 December 2007: Chelsea and England player Ashley Cole is photographed making a clear V-sign toward Arsenal fans. There is no immediately available record of the FA taking any action.

19 January 2010: Manchester United and England player Gary Neville is photographed clearly extending a middle finger toward Manchester City‘s Carlos Tevez in full view of fans, at the end of a heated local derby. There is no immediately available record of the FA taking any action.

There’s the hard part done for you. Now do your jobs. Find out whether Cole and Neville were punished — Cole for doing precisely what Suarez is accused of, Neville for doing something similar and surely no more excusable.

If you find that they were indeed punished, then inform us, and demand the same for Suarez.

If you find that they were not, demand equal treatment for Suarez, regardless of the fact that he is your pantomime villain and does not play his international football for England.

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